Hercules
Season 2
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This page was last updated on 02/20/01.

Narrator: "This is the story of a time long ago, a
time of myth and legend, when ancient gods were petty and cruel, and they
plagued mankind with suffering. Only one man dared to challenge their
power -- Hercules. Hercules possessed a strength the world had never seen,
a strength surpassed only by the power of his heart. He journeyed the
Earth, battling the minions of his wicked step-mother, Hera, the all-powerful
queen of the gods. But wherever there was evil, wherever an innocent would
suffer, there would be Hercules."

The King of Thieves
01/24/2000
Autolycus: "I try to start everyday with a healthy dose of
excitement ... anything to get the old heart started."
Dirce (re: "Cyros): "No crime goes unpunished
here. It's the law. Unfortunately, when the real culprit can't be
found, innocent people have been executed. ... I'm sorry, but the
law is part of our tradition. And as much as the King loves things that
are new, tradition gets the best of him every time."
Hercules: "And you're willing to let your tradition kill an innocent
man."
Dirce (re: Iolaus): "I only care about protecting my clients. Justice
for the people. Humanity before tradition. But frankly, if we don't
catch the real thief, his goose is cooked."
Iolaus: "His name was Autolycus."
Dirce: "Autolycus? ... The peasants call him the 'King of
Thieves'."
Autolycus: "If I didn't like trouble, I would have gone
into a different line of work."
Dirce: "Justice is not a game. Justice is life."
King Menelaus: "I cling to tradition because I am trying to
preserve our ways of life here in Cyros. ..."
Dirce: "I want you to care about people as much as you care about your
inventions."
Autolycus: "... it looks like a beautiful day in the
neighborhood."
King Menelaus: "... tradition must be honored. It's
what keeps us civilized."
Iolaus (to Dirce while being led to his execution): "Just
keep fighting for justice and reason."
Hercules (to King Menelaus): "Humanity is more
important. Start a new tradition."
Iolaus (re: Dirce): "... I left my heart in Cyros."
Hercules: "... but you kept your head."

All That Glitters

What's In a Name?

Siege at Naxos

The Outcast

Under the Broken Sky
12/29/1999
Woman: "Oh, flex for me!"
Hercules: "Sorry, ladies, I don't flex."

The Mother of All Monsters
12/29/1999
Iolaus (re: Hercules' mother marrying Jason): "Come on,
Hercules, just because she's your mother doesn't mean she can't get
married."

The Other Side

The Fire Down Below

Cast a Giant Shadow

Highway to Hades

The Sword of Veracity

The Enforcer

Once a Hero
01/20/2000
Iolaus: "Pick on someone your own size. ...
--"
Otus: "There is no one my own size."
Iolaus: "Ah! You got a point."
Archivus: "Sometimes truth has to be sacrificed for
art."
Archivus: "Behold the Golden Fleece."
Peddler: "I have Hercules dolls. Exact
likeness."
Iolaus: "It's an old hunter's trick."
Phoebe: "This is crazy, fighting among ourselves."
Iolaus: "... I hate volcanoes."
Castor (to Argonauts): "You may have lived as warriors, but
you're going to die as fools."

Heedless Hearts

Let the Games Begin
12/29/1999
Salmoneous (describing the competitive games being planned by
Hercules): "It's Herculean!"
Hercules: "I prefer to think of it as Olympian."

The Apple
08/20/2000
Hercules (to Iolaus): "... you rode a piece of wood on a
wave. You mean ... this is going to catch on and become popular?"
Hercules: "Hate's like anything else. After a while,
it becomes a habit."
Aphrodite (re: surf): "Break's better at Calydon. But
the guys are cuter here."
Artemus: "The guys are cuter! Give me a break."
Athena: "What a bimbo!"
Artemus (to Iolaus): "How would you like to be the greatest
warrior the world has ever seen? Even greater than Hercules.
... And if that doesn't do it for you, I can make you the world's best
wrestler or fastest runner. Think about it. --"
Athena: "Reflection is the hallmark of a superior
mind. ... You know, it's sad, really, Artemis' obsession with
sports. And Aphrodite, well, let's just say there's a lot of echoing going
on between those ears. ... ... to you, I offer the greatest gift
imaginable -- wisdom -- a mind like none the world has ever known."
Iolaus (in vision of wisdom): "... ... in the end, we must learn to
go beyond our limitations and accept as an act of faith that some things may
exist even if we cannot see or understand them. ..."
Athena: "I must say, you'd make a great wiseman. Choose me and you'll
be remembered forever."
Athena (re: Aphrodite after Artemus and Athena had already
offered Iolaus bribes): "I can't believe she'd resort to bribery."
Aphrodite (re: Gold Apple to Iolaus): "Hold this close to
your heart and any woman you want will fall hopelessly in love with you.
If you both touch it at the same time, you'll be soul mates forever. You
know you want it. Pick me and it's yours."
Aphrodite: "I am the goddess of love. How would it
look to lose a beauty contest ...?"
Hercules (to Aphrodite): "... You're not as dumb as
you pretend to be."
[Hercules and Iolaus between Dolos and Syros armies]
Iolaus: "I'd rather be fishing."
Iolaus: "Why does keeping the peace have to be so
violent?"
Iolaus: "Boy, I'm never going to look at an apple the same
way again."
Hercules: "I know what you mean. You know my cousin, Asclepius?"
Iolaus: "The one who does medicine?"
Hercules: Yeah! He's always saying, 'An apple a day keeps Asclepius
away.' I could never figure out what he meant by that."
Iolaus: "Well, who could? Ever try to read one of his
prescriptions?"

Promises

King for a Day

Protean Challenge
08/20/2000
Hercules: "How's your sculpture coming, Thanis?"
Thanis: "Ah, it's only three weeks till the exhibit in Athens, and I'm
still waiting for the rock to tell what it wants to be."
Iolaus: "... Yeah, rocks are stubborn that way."
Hercules: "... I believe in justice as long as it's
just. ... Killing a man for stealing isn't justice."
Magistrate: "... he won't be stoned. We're not
Barbarians. ... We'll simply chop off his hands."
Hercules: "... misery loves company."
Iolaus: "My hearing's not too good when jealousy plugs up
my ears."
Hercules (naming the thief): "It was Proteus."
Iolaus: "Proteus? You mean, the god who changes shape?"
Hercules: "... my mother taught me I shouldn't ridicule
anyone simply because they're different than me."
Iolaus: "The smell of blood brings out the worst in
people."
Proteus: "All I wanted was to love and be loved in
return. Was that too much to ask?"
Hercules: "No, but you can't force someone to love you."
Proteus: "How else was I supposed to do it?"
Hercules: "You have to be who you are, Proteus. That's all anybody
can be."

Wedding of Alcmene

The Power

Centaur Mentor Journey
03/08/1999
Salmoneus: "Air-sandals. ... each one of the has a squirrel
bladder lovingly sewn inside. You blow in it ... -- tie it off ... and it's like
walking on air."
Hercules: "Hmmm! How does the squirrel feel about it?"
Salmoneus: "I even have a slogan, 'The son of Zeus in on the loose
with Herculoid Air-sandals'."
Salmoneus: "Not nice to hit somebody from behind."
Thief: "Oh, I should do it face to face?"
Salmoneus: :It's more sporting."
Salmoneus (re: Theseus): "Not much of a talker, is he?"
Hercules: "That's not a bad thing."
Ceridian: "... sip it, don't slurp it."
Ceridian: "... my greatest pleasure has always come from tutoring
young men.... Watching them grow into good, productive beings."
Theseus: "I don't want you to die."
Ceridian: "I know, but that's the natural course of all living things. The
birds, trees, flowers -- they all bloom, reproduce, then fade away, to make room for
others to bloom in their place."
Salmoneus: "I hope they teach business and marketing concepts ...,
like the value of celebrity endorsements and 'buy wholesale and sale retail'."
Hercules: "... education is a wonderful thing."
Cassius: "What do we want?"
Centaur group: "Equal rights!"
Cassius: "When do we want it?"
Centaur group: "Now!"
Cassius: "Sympathy is for the week."
Hercules: "It's never easy letting someone you love go."
Salmoneus: "Some of my best friends are cheap labor."
Hercules: "Moral battles may be worth dying for, but not street
brawls."
Gredor: "Being a magistrate has its advantages."
Ceridian: "Saving lives is more important than watching one slip
away."
Hercules: "Violence begets violence."
Cassius: "We still have a long way to reach equality, but violence
isn't the answer."

Cave of Echoes
